BEHOLD, the NEW RATS

Yogi, left, is a black self dumbo, and Koda, right, is a black Berkshire top-ear. They're about seven months old. These two came already named from the MSPCA. Usually rats in a group together get theme names, because humans like patterns; Google says these two are named after some beagles on Instagram. That's boring, so I combed through the WWWJDIC for some ateji/jinmeiyou kanji that I liked. I've decided the names are actually spelled 容疑 (yōgi, "looks suspicious") and 幸多 (kōda, "many blessings"). 

I have matched the correct name to the correct rat, trust me. Yogi is the fourth dumbo rat I've had who believes he is in charge of the entire universe. He is also the fourth dumbo rat I've had, period. I am starting to think it's genetic. Something about the shape of that flat little skull just doesn't leave any room for humility.

The volunteer at Nevins said they were surrendered because they were "nippy", but further investigation suggests that they just didn't get along well with the toddler in the house. Rats have a lot of opinions, and sometimes those opinions are 'stop poking me with your sticky fingers, I'm napping'. Yogi is a super-chill little booger who decided that pudding = friend about five minutes after meeting me. I was scritching him through the carrier door on the way home and he did not have a single fuck to give. Koda read the rat handbook slightly better and did wonder momentarily whether I might eat him, but I didn't seem to be eating Yogi, and his brother was hogging all the pudding, so.

I must just radiate an aura of Rat Expert, because I asked the MSPCA volunteer if it was all right to try to tempt them out with pudding, and she was all, "Sure! Feed them whatever! Or open the cage! I trust you!" By the time I left with my new pets, the front desk was commenting on how calm they seemed to be. My genius plan for befriending rats is basically just 'be nice and have tasty snacks', but I also wasn't a loud clumsy child, which probably helped. I burrito'd (bur-rat-to'd?) the two of them in one of their cage fleeces and got them into the carrier myself.

They've been installed into Schloß Ratter, where the two of them have already tracked grape bits all over everything. They're currently sleeping out in the open, on separate shelves, in pancake form. (Generally when a rat decides to give up on having bones, that means they're safe and comfortable.) I haven't weighed them yet, but Koda seems to be a pretty normal size for an adolescent boy rat. Yogi already has a comfortable number of rolls, and if he ever grows into those truck nutz he's dragging around, he's going to be enormous.

One of my roommates delights in cooking things for other people, so I asked if they might enjoy the challenge of cooking for rats! Yes. Yes they would. I bought the ingredients and they are currently downstairs doing... something? with the grocery bag full of chicken and assorted vegetables. I think zucchini fries are involved. They did ask me 'is there anything rats don't eat?' and I laughed and laughed and instead gave them the list of things rats shouldn't eat, even though they probably would if given the chance.

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