I have the weirdest anxiety dreams. The Sandman has realized that it doesn't do any good to send me the normal ones, because I don't react right. I've never had the one where I'm out in public in my underwear, probably because I come close to that IRL on a regular basis, and don't care.

The last time I had the one where we were being chased through a mall by zombies, I just sort of looked around at the survivors and went 'welp, let's go see what we can loot from the sporting goods store'.

I've had the one where nobody tells me I'm supposed to get up and give a talk to a jillion people until right before it happens. I get up on stage, smile and say hello, tell the audience what the event crew just pulled on me, and witter on about whatever I know about the topic, which is usually not zero.

I just had one where I was back in college, and they sent someone to my dorm room to tell me that they Vehemently Objected to something I'd posted in my personal blog, and they wanted it taken down. I read it back -- it was about drugs or sex or something -- and there was nothing even remotely legally actionable in it, so I said no. The university rep implied Dire Consequences if I didn't, which annoyed me. As soon as they left, I pored over my paperwork, realized I had signed nothing that made such disciplinary threats confidential, and promptly posted to every social media channel I could access about the trouble, complete with copious links to the article they didn't want anyone to read. I woke up at that point, but I assume that the dream!internet took care of the rest.


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