Rat, you are tiny and insane

Me: Psst, rat! Would you like some of the crust from my sandwich?

Rat: *snifnifnif* Meh.

Me: ...okay. Maybe a dried chickpea from your treats jar?

Rat: Ehhh. I guess.

Me: How about this slip of paper that was once in contact with the foil wrapper that was once in contact with a piece of chocolate? Which I ate a couple of hours ago, and is therefore no longer anywhere near the wrapper.

Rat: HOLY SHIT YOU HAND THAT OVER RIGHT NOW.

They're remarkably smart for critters with the cranial capacity of like half a ping-pong ball, but sometimes I wonder about their sanity.

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